Category Archives: Living Faith

Books Read in 2022: Christian Thinking and Life Management (and one Just for Fun)

25 Saturday Mar 2023

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Here’s another installment of my micro book reviews for 2022. In my last post, I shared the books I read for our homeschool. This time around, I’ve collected my 2022 reads on Christian Thought as well as Life Management (and a bonus category Just For Fun).

Christian books theology life management book reviews

Christian Books on Theology, Practice, Philosophy, or Education

On Christian Teaching by Augustine This was probably the oldest work I read last year, aside from Plutarch and the Bible. Writing in the fourth century, Augustine lays out some important guidelines and considerations for teaching–with applications for education in general and for the study and teaching of the Scriptures. Augustine’s ordering of loves (ordo amoris) is incredibly edifying, explaining how all earthly loves can and ought to be turned into the stream of love that we have for God most of all. He also addresses some classical education practices and suggests how Christians ought to approach them. I found reading Augustine to be more approachable and edifying than I had anticipated. I can see why his writing has stood the test of time.

Let Me be a Woman by Elisabeth Elliot This was a re-read of a beloved book. Elisabeth Elliot is one of my all-time favorite authors. Given the crazy confusion of our time, it was good to be immersed in a book that celebrates being a woman—and being a godly woman at that. Let Me be a Woman is a collection of short chapters written to Elliot’s daughter, making her prose both warm and candid. Here’s a particularly poignant quote about worldly attitudes toward women:

Women’s work, particularly the task assigned by Creation exclusively to women, that of bearing and nurturing children, is regarded not only as of lesser value but even degrading and “animal-like.” This is a hideous distortion of the truth, and an attempt to judge women by the criteria of men, to force them into an alien mold, to rob them of the very gifts that make them what they were meant to be. To subject femininity to the criteria of masculinity is as foolish as it would be to judge meat by the standards of potatoes. Meat would fail every test. For women to assume an esatz [or artificial] masculinity means that they will always lose.

Let Me Be a Woman, P. 151

Turns out women also lose when men assume an “esatz” femininity. But I digress…

Christian Reflections (essays) by C. S. Lewis I have to say, Lewis is right up there with Elisabeth Elliot as one of my favorite authors. I bought this book initially for Lewis’ essay on “Historicism,” which I very much enjoyed. I’ve read many of his books: The Chronicles of Narnia (series), The Screwtape Letters, Mere Christianity, A Grief Observed, The Great Divorce, The Four Loves, The Abolition of Man, and That Hideous Strength. But this is my first read through a collection of his essays. Lewis has an incredible ability to evaluate the past and see where things are headed in days to come. I don’t always agree with his take on everything (his essay on “Church Music” being a good example), but he sure does make me think. Here are some of my favorite essays from this collection: “The Poison of Subjectivism,” “Historicism,” “The Psalms,” “The Language of Religion,” and “Modern Theology and Biblical Criticism.” So many of the problems we see today are the fall-out of ideas that Lewis confronted in his day. I think this makes his writing essential reading. Start with Narnia (at least The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe) and Mere Christianity, especially if you need to strengthen your reading muscles. But do work your way “further up and further in.” You will be rewarded for doing so.

First Principles: Becoming a Disciple by Geoff Reed My husband and I hosted an outreach Bible study last year using this first book in the First Principles series. We covered the gospel, baptism, and the call to renew our minds in God’s truth, which stands in stark contrast to the ideas and values of the world. It was a great study, digging into one Bible passage for each lesson, as well as offering discussion questions and commentary. One thing that sets this book apart from other Bible studies is the heavy emphasis on both discussion and follow-through. The questions make you think and examine the Scriptures without feeling like an exercise out of an academic textbook. There is ample room for taking your own notes and recording your own questions to bring to discussion. And the sixth and final lesson in the book asks you to look back over the first five lessons to restate what you’ve learned, ground it in the Scriptures, pick a verse or passage to memorize, and set some goal or intention for your life going forward. A lot of studies have little assignments with each lesson and then just plow ahead. This one makes you sit with what you’ve covered a bit more–and challenges you to really apply it before moving on. Because simply gaining academic knowledge of God’s word isn’t what we’re after–we want to respond to it properly, applying it to our lives with the help of the Holy Spirit and in fellowship with other believers who can hold us accountable.

The Essential Means of Grace by Paul Washer I have appreciated the teaching of Paul Washer since my college days, but this is the first book I’ve read by him. It was a short but meaty and refreshing read, covering our relationship to God through the Scriptures, prayer, repentance and confession, and the local church. Highly recommended. Only 71 pages.

Messiah: Prophecies Fulfilled by D. James Kennedy My husband read this to us in December as our Advent devotional. It was a good overview of Old Testament prophecies about Jesus Christ, the Son of God. My boys are in 7th and 5th grade, and it was a good fit for our family, though there was a reference to infant baptism, which we do not practice, so we simply and briefly discussed that with our kids. (Links are to a newer version of the book than we own.)

Life Skills/Management

Do More Better by Tim Challies I started 2022 off listening to this audiobook. Challies has some good principles for productivity that were helpful to me, and for a season I tried his process for managing tasks in ToDoist. I fell off of that specific application, but together with the books listed below, I think this has been a help to my focus and life management this past year.

Essentialism by Gregg McKeown This was recommended by a friend last spring and I snagged it on Audible. I wish I had a hard copy, because I think there are some diagrams that would be helpful, especially to review. At any rate, I loved this book. It urges you to really ask the important questions—what matters most? What is most essential? And then it challenges you to live by that. It’s not a Christian book, but it is Christian-friendly.

Effortless by Gregg McKeown This is the follow-up book to Essentialism. I’m not sure “effortless” is really what you get out of it, but the author does help you think through applying the principles of essentialism more thoroughly to your life. It was a good listen (again, audiobook). I will probably revisit both of these books sometime soon—maybe even this year. I think they’ve helped me a lot.

Cozy Minimalist Home by Myquillyn Smith I found this delightful book at an “extras” bookstore on our long drive home from a trip to Florida. Why have I never read a book on decorating before? I’ve been a homemaker for fifteen years, for crying out loud! Anyway, I’m glad I read this and glad to have some principles and guidelines for making décor decisions for my home. Cozy + minimalist is really a great combination, putting people above stuff, but also not putting bare minimalism over people. The author is apparently a Christian, so the decorating advice is well-ordered and not at all about putting on a show or keeping up with the Joneses.

Don’t Overthink It by Anne Bogel This was a fairly helpful book. As I listened to the audiobook, I kept finding myself wishing that the author would have dealt with the spiritual side of worry/overthinking. Instead all she did was give positive tips and tricks. All of which are helpful, but it’s just not the complete picture, and I had hoped for better from an author who is a professing Christian. Tips and tricks don’t fix my trust-in-God issues. All that to say, this was a profitable listen, but not nearly so much as it could have been. This is a your-best-life-now kind of book, and needs to be balanced by biblical truth.

Ploductivity by Doug Wilson Speaking of biblical truth, there’s a lot of it in this little book (again, for me, audiobook). I was surprised to find a lot of discussion on technology—even a theology of technology. This book was far less about tips and tricks and processes and far more about our assumptions and beliefs about technology, work, etc. A very good read, especially after having finished Don’t Overthink It and finding it wanting in the theological department. That said, I don’t share Doug Wilson’s Presbyterian eschatology, which does come out in the book; but that is a small part of the whole, and it was interesting and edifying to listen to nonetheless.

Just for Fun

The Inimitable Jeeves by P. G. Wodehouse This was my second-ever Wodehouse read. I liked The Code of the Woosters better, but this book was fun, too. I read it at the beginning of 2022 and can hardly remember what happened in the story…Bertie gets himself in trouble and Jeeves has to help him out of it, but some of that trouble is caused this time by his even-more-pathetic friend, Bingo. This one is more serial while all of Code of the Woosters unfolds from Bertie’s accidental pinching of a cow creamer. It’s hard to beat a cow creamer for ridiculous and memorable comedy. So if you want to enjoy some good laughs and British humor, you know which one I’d recommend.

That’s a wrap for today! What are your favorite Christian theology or Christian living books?
What books have helped you to manage life well?
I don’t seem to make much space for fun, comedic reading, but I find it refreshing when I do–what about you?

For more Books Read in 2022:
For Homeschooling
On Marxism and Black Christian Perspective (coming soon!)

Book Review: Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners by John Bunyan

07 Tuesday Feb 2023

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I recently started logging my reading on Goodreads. You can follow me there to see what I’m currently reading and to catch new reviews that I write.

This is the second review I’ve written. I had my oldest son read John Bunyan’s autobiography this year for school, alongside Pilgrim’s Progress. I enjoyed (well, mostly enjoyed) listening to the book so that I could be ready to discuss it with my son. Here’s my review, originally posted on Goodreads:


Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners by John Bunyan

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I’m giving John Bunyan’s autobiography 4 stars simply because it is a bit difficult to enjoy at times–partly due to the older language but mostly due to the fact that as you hear Bunyan detail his struggles against temptation, doubt, and despair, you keep longing for him to come to a final resolution. But for Bunyan, this resolution takes a long time in coming, with many, many ups and downs. Over half the book seems to stay in this back-and-forth state–Will he ultimately be condemned? Or is the Lord’s saving of him sure? Has he committed the unpardonable sin? Is the love of God in Christ still his?

I’ve heard that CS Lewis called Bunyan’s autobiography something like a trip to an asylum. And for half the book, I can feel why.

Bunyan took his own sin and temptation very seriously. One might like to say he at times took it too seriously, but Bunyan seems to conclude that he took the accusations of the enemy of his soul too seriously and did not readily enough approach the throne of grace for help in time of need. This is quite instructive to modern readers: take sin seriously, but take grace seriously, too.

It is the grace of God and the righteousness of Christ that at last secures Bunyan’s hope. But, in God’s providence, his struggles for assurance up to that point of clarity seem to have given him a humility that prepared him for ministry and a depth of understanding of both theology and the human condition that enabled him to pen the classic Pilgrim’s Progress. What a gift to the church!

In contrast to the shiny, suave image that a lot of celebrity pastors put forth today, Bunyan the tinker invites us to know the deep struggles of his soul for assurance before God, which he could only ultimately find in the righteousness of Christ and in the faithful love of God. Reading his autobiography is an encouragement that God can and does use those tender hearts (perhaps sometimes too tender?) who mourn their sin and love their Savior.

If you want an interesting pairing, try reading this book alongside John Owen’s Indwelling Sin in Believers. Owen was a contemporary of Bunyan and reportedly admired him. The Lord used Bunyan outside of the Church of England (and even while imprisoned by it), and He used Owen within it. Both had a great understanding of the fight against sin (Owen more so theologically and Bunyan more so experientially). Both men’s writings are a gift to believers for which we can thank God.



View all my reviews

Have you read Grace Abounding to the Chief of Sinners? What did you think?

Processing the Past with Grace: Deconstructing the Faith vs. Disentangling from False Teaching

26 Thursday Jan 2023

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Last night I watched Allie Beth Stuckey interview Jinger Duggar Vuolo about her new book, Becoming Free Indeed, in which she details how she was raised under the legalistic teachings of Bill Gothard and how she has come to be free from them by a more thorough and biblical understanding of the gospel and the nature of God Himself.

I’m sharing the interview here (at the end of article) because I think that this conversation is important for a few reasons:

One. Deconstruction and ex-vangelicalism is a fad these days. It’s “cool” to talk about all the bad things you experienced or were taught and then to throw under the bus anyone or any belief system that still holds to anything remotely resembling those things.

Were you pressured to conform to extra-biblical man-made standards of modesty? You can now be suspect of anyone that promotes modesty at all.

Were you taught a perverted version of male headship that left you with no strength of will and perhaps subjected you to mistreatment? You can now be sure that the bible has absolutely nothing different to say to men and women ever. Consider it your mission to rescue women from any and all discussions of biblical manhood and womanhood–those categories, whether defined biblically or not, just aren’t ok anymore.

Were you hurt by judgmental people in the church? You can now vent your bitterness, expose the hypocrisy, and throw church away altogether because of it. They’re all a bunch of hypocrites anyway.

Was Jesus and His word used to manipulate you for someone else’s advantage? You can now be free by abandoning the biblical Jesus altogether, either by becoming agnostic or following your favorite liberal/progressive Christian influencer who will tell you that Jesus agrees with everything that is currently politically correct.

Oh, and don’t forget that any appeal to the Scriptures now qualifies as “spiritual manipulation.” The bible is only allowed to make you feel good about yourself, not to convict you of sin–anything but that.

If you listen to the voices promoting this kind of deconstruction, you’ll be following a pendulum swing from legalism and spiritual abuse on the one end to license and its spiritual abuses on the other. Be warned: Self-righteousness can puff you up whether you’re proud of what you condemn or proud of what you accept.

Legalism and spiritual manipulation are real problems (just listen to Jinger). But they’re wrong and wind up hurting people precisely because they violate what God has said in His word; they’re not a reason to explain away “politically incorrect” passages or abandon the Bible altogether.

Misusing a tool doesn’t make the tool bad. It just means you need to learn to use it properly.

Two. I’ve seen first hand the fall-out from the teachings of Bill Gothard and other groups or leaders who elevate personality, tribalism, and fads of supposed holiness over wise, humble faithfulness to God’s word and teaching that refuses to take the Scriptures out of context.

Jinger explains toward the end of the interview the difference between deconstruction (like I illustrated above) and the kind of careful work it takes to disentangle your faith from false teaching. She used a helpful illustration of having “putty” in your hair.

Do you just chop it all off or do you carefully take it out bit by bit so that you can preserve what is good–in this case, your hair?

There is something worth holding onto, worth preserving. Disentangling seeks to keep the good, to keep the faith, while detaching it from the bad, that is, the false teaching or misguided ideas. Deconstructing, on the other hand, pulls it all down together, without necessarily having a view to building anything back up again.

I have a lot of homeschooled friends now in their 30s and 40s. I’ve watched as some of them have had to process these things. Some do it well, like Jinger has apparently done. But some have thrown the baby out with the bathwater and are now given over to worldliness (having completely or nearly completely deconstructed). It’s my prayer that this interview might help those who are still sorting things out. And that it might call out to those who have sorted things out poorly: come back to Christ.

Three. Jinger doesn’t exhibit any of the negative attitudes you’ll see from some of the other whistle-blowers out there. Praise be to God, she speaks graciously of her parents even while exposing the teaching that they had unfortunately latched onto and promoted to their children. With the help of her husband and solid teaching, Jinger has been able to evaluate what she was taught by reading the Scriptures in context. From what I can tell, she’s not pendulum swinging nor holding onto or promoting bitterness. This makes her an example of how to sort things out in the fruit of the Spirit–something painfully missing from a lot of critiques today.

Four. It’s good to be reminded that cult-like following of one man’s teaching isn’t healthy. I don’t care if it’s Bill Gothard (problematic), Joel Osteen (problematic), or even John MacArthur (a faithful teacher). No one-man show is going to have the corner on all biblical truth. The body of Christ is full of believers with different gifts and different experiences in order that we might edify one another. This is true at the local level and it is also true when it comes to public teachers and writers, both contemporary and from church history.

We benefit from wide reading within Christian orthodoxy.

Sometimes in our efforts to be “safe” we fall prey to the sins that we weren’t watching out for. Falling in lock-step with one teacher and his tribe will likely keep you from seeing a host of blind spots.

Finally, this brings me to a couple important points I’d like to make (and then I’ll share that interview, I promise!).

If no one-man show has the corner on all biblical truth (no matter how well credentialed), I think it’s safe to say that no parents are going to get it all just right in raising their kids. Not the Duggars, not your parents, not mine.

We can choose to give the benefit of the doubt to those who loved us enough to take our raising seriously, being thankful for the good and being wary of the bad or misleading. If we have good parents, this is what they desire for their children anyway–to learn not just from what they taught us but also from their mistakes. To do better than they did but without thinking too highly of ourselves and spurning them in the process.

While Jinger and many others are picking up the pieces after having had some actual bad teaching in their growing up years, some people are abandoning ship because of their own misunderstandings and misapplications–perhaps because the teaching they received was a mix of good and bad or because it was good but it wasn’t complete.

The mind of a child or young adult may not put the pieces together just right. This does, of course, raise the bar for us as parents to do the best we can to help them, but it also should humble the child who thinks all of their problems came only from their parents or teachers.

Shocker: we can’t blame everyone else for all of our problems.

We bring to the teaching we receive our own personality quirks, experiences, and fallible attempts to make sense of the world, not to mention our own amount of faith or lack thereof. Not only are our teachers fallible in their teaching, we are fallible in our understanding. This should bring us to a place where we rely so much more on the grace of God in Christ for all of our shortcomings and sins, and on the Holy Spirit to guide us in Truth as we interact with God’s word and His people–with humility and grace.

Growing up and keeping the faith takes processing the past (because we all have one) with careful consideration, prayer, study of the Scriptures, and fellowship with godly believers who are willing to discuss all of these things with humble care for one another and humble reverence for Christ. No matter how you were raised, commit yourself to these things, connect yourself with these kinds of people in a local church.

And may you hold fast to Christ and to what is good.

Here’s the interview:

Remember and Rejoice: Thanksgiving Meditations from the Book of Deuteronomy

20 Sunday Nov 2022

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This post was originally published four years ago on November 19, 2018. That was the first Thanksgiving after my PopPop passed away. This year, Thanksgiving 2022 will be the first Thanksgiving after losing my Grandma. I had forgotten the context of this article when reviewing it this year, so when I read it today the concluding thoughts really hit home. Maybe it will (again?) be a blessing to some of you, as well. 

I’ve had the pleasure recently of reading through Deuteronomy as I follow my Bible reading plan.

Deuteronomy? Pleasure? you may ask. Well, yes.

While it’s sometimes hard to slog through the books of the Old Testament, there are gems to be found, and I discovered that Deuteronomy had some relevant passages for this season of Thanksgiving.

In fact, the many references to “rejoicing” in the book surprised me! Sprinkled throughout much of the book are commands regarding the feasts that Israel was to celebrate–and celebrate with gusto!

remember rejoice thanksgiving celebrate

It’s not my intention to give a detailed overview of the feasts mentioned here, but rather I hope to express the elements of God-centered celebration that I have found helpful as we head into the holiday season.

In America, we have only one feast-day that harkens back to agricultural times: Thanksgiving. And while “giving thanks” isn’t really mentioned in Deuteronomy concerning the Jewish feasts, the purpose of these celebrations is clear: to remember and bless the Lord for His provision.

So whether it’s First Fruits (celebrated in late spring) or the Feast of Ingathering or Tabernacles (celebrated in the fall), the heart of each is expressed in Deuteronomy 8:10, “When you have eaten and are satisfied, you shall bless the LORD your God for the good land which He has given you.”

When you enter the land for the first time, bless the Lord. When you reap its goodness each year, bless the Lord.

We moderns find ourselves a bit far-removed from this kind of dependence upon the land. Not that we don’t eat its produce, but we rarely experience an actual harvest without going out of our way to do so.

I found myself reading about the Offering of First Fruits within a few days of harvesting our first ever (and completely volunteer) pumpkin patch. Nevermind the different time of year and different crops they would have had in Israel (olives, figs, etc), this passage resonated with me.

Here’s what Deuteronomy 26 says about First Fruits:

The Israelites were to bring their offering before the Lord and announce, after recounting the history of God’s provision for their people, “Now behold, I have brought the first of the produce of the ground which You, O LORD have given me.” And then they were instructed to “set it down before the LORD your God, and worship before the LORD you God; and you and the Levite and the alien who is among you shall rejoice in all the good which the LORD your God has given you and your household.“

Now, when I read about the Israelites giving the first of their produce to the Lord, I can’t help but think of that one, solitary, beautiful, orange pumpkin we picked. Sure, we picked 14 green ones. But that first, ripe orb was our delight! And that pumpkin, and no other, would, in another time and place, be offered to the Lord. It would be His, not ours.

This vivid picture of the pride of our harvest belonging to the Lord began to expand in my mind. Not just fruits of the land. Fruit of the womb, also. The first born son would be the Lord’s (Exodus 34:19-20).

Just like that first pumpkin is the Lord’s and is intended to remind me that all of our pumpkins are His, so too my first child is the Lord’s–and by extension any further children are.

“The earth is the LORD’s and all it contains.”

I’m beginning to get it.

Deuteronomy 26:16 continues: “This day the LORD your God commands you to do these statutes and ordinances [immediate context is the feast of first fruits]. You shall therefore be careful to do them with all your heart and all your soul.”

What did the statutes and ordinances in this passage involve?

Remembering God’s goodness and covenant
Bringing the first of your produce
Worshiping before God
Rejoicing (with the Levite and alien!) in all the good which the LORD your God has given you and your household–there is a community giving thanks!
Sharing with the Levite, stranger, orphan, and widow–there is a community being cared for!
“I have not eaten it while mourning”–just in case you missed it, rejoicing is emphasized here by negatively stating its opposite.
Praying for God’s future blessing on His people “Look down and bless”

The Israelites were to do all of these things with all of their heart and all of their soul! “Soul” in the bible usually denotes your whole being, including your body. So, everything within us (heart) and all that we are (soul) ought to go into this remembering, rejoicing, worshiping, sharing, blessing…

Is this not the essence of thanksgiving?!?

The Feast of Ingathering (Deuteronomy 16:13-15) has similar instructions:

You shall celebrate the Feast of Booths seven days after you have gathered in from your threshing floor and your wine vat; and you shall rejoice in your feast, you and your son and your daughter and your male and female servants and the Levite and the stranger and the orphan and the widow who are in your towns. Seven days you shall celebrate a feast to the Lord your God in the place which the Lord chooses, because the Lord your God will bless you in all your produce and in all the work of your hands, so that you will be altogether joyful.

So much rejoicing! Again, this is a feast not only remembering past blessings (the things gathered in) but also awaiting with expectant joy the future provision of the Lord.

I can’t help but think of the Passover, which also looked back at past deliverance and forward to the Messiah. And of the Lord’s Supper, by which we remember and “proclaim the Lord’s death until He comes.” It seems the pattern of biblical celebration looks both backward and forward. It’s a pattern of remembering and rejoicing!

celebrate thanksgiving remember rejoice

All of this imagery and idealism is wonderful, but what if I’m heading into Thanksgiving with a nasty cold and way too many servings of responsibility and stress on my plate? And what if this is the first major holiday without a dearly loved family member?

This is where the rubber meets the road, isn’t it? There are things to begrudge and mourn. A lack of health, a lack of peace, and an empty chair at the table.

For an Israelite to swear, “I did not eat it while mourning” they would have had to push pause on, well, life. Because life is hard and we experience loss and disappointment often. Even in times of abundance.

I don’t have a remote with a quick-and-easy-fix button to literally pause pain so that rejoicing is effortless. But I can remember the Lord’s goodness and provision–past and present, in times of abundance and in times of need.

And I can rejoice. Because I know the One who will “guide the future as He has the past.”

As I went for a walk today (for the first time in what seems like forever) I had to deal with my grumbling attitude that had become my more-often-than-not companion in the past few days. The sunshine and fresh air helped to remind me that the world is still a beautiful place and God is still on His throne–even if I don’t get everything done, even if I’m carrying around my own personal storm cloud.

And as it turned out, being sick forced me to push pause today. I took a nap. In the quiet of a walk, in the quiet of my couch, in the midst of a busy, noisy, frenetic season, the Lord calmed my heart and reminded me of His care and provision.

Perhaps I can leave that storm cloud behind. Remember the Lord. Rejoice in His provision. And share that with those around me this Thanksgiving.

How about you?

Here are a few hymns that refreshed my soul on my walk today as the Lord brought them to mind. Looking to the Lord as a good, sovereign Provider is necessary if we’re to give Him thanks, isn’t it? I hope these songs will bless you as they have blessed me.

God Moves in a Mysterious Way (with added chorus in the video):

Be Still My Soul:

And, finally, one that actually gives thanks, rejoicing: For the Beauty of the Earth

Looking for more posts on Thanksgiving? Here you go:

The Poverty of Pragmatic Gratitude and the Riches of True Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving: A Holiday Made for Unsettling Times

“Goodbye, Instagram” … Two Years Later

22 Monday Aug 2022

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I wanted to hop on here to commemorate the day that I ditched Instagram. And to reflect, once again, on what life is like without it–this time two years later instead of just two months.

I had my reasons for saying goodbye to the ‘gram:

  1. The instant/constant nature of the beast
  2. The time-sink
  3. Low return on investment for blog traffic
  4. Seeing a friend’s reasons for leaving gave me permission to hop off, too

You can read explanations of each of those points in my original post here.

[Aside: I’ve realized in further reflection that the politicization of everything is another reason I got off. But the explanation of that point would require an entire blog post in itself. I’ll save that for another day. Maybe.]

Lately I’ve felt a little twinge of nostalgia for those square pictures. I remember the reasons I was on there for about two years before I quit…

  1. I wanted to drive some traffic to my blog
  2. It was fun to see beautiful pictures of books, kids, planners, educational quotes, etc
  3. It was fun to share those sometimes random, precious, and/or entertaining moments with others
  4. It was easier to write an encouraging or thoughtful caption than to write and edit a blog post–so I was at least getting some ideas and inspiration out there more often
quit instagram two years later social media

So, does the potential for good outweigh the bad? Will I be giving it another go?

No.

Definitely not.

Those feelings of nostalgia aren’t necessarily bad, but they are misplaced. I want my emotional energy to be primarily directed to the people in my family, my church, my broader local community. I don’t need to build up more nostalgia for a social media platform. I need to invest in building up emotional ties where they really matter.

“Where your treasure is there your heart will be also.” Jesus is talking about the love of money vs. the love of God, but I think the principle applies just as well to how we spend our time and attention. What we care about we invest in, and what we invest in we care about.

The nostalgia isn’t a reason for getting back on. It’s yet another reason for staying away.

All of my original reasons for quitting Instagram are still valid. And in the two years I’ve been off, I am finding that I’m growing in several areas:

  1. Contentment–It’s easier to enjoy the sometimes random, precious, and entertaining moments for what they are if I’m not wrestling with an urge to make them public. Not to mention, it’s a lot harder to compare yourself to air-brushed standards of parenting, beauty, organization, you-name-it if you aren’t looking at them. With that surface-level of discontentment stripped away, I’ve found deeper layers of it that needed to be dealt with. And I’m growing.
  2. Focus–There are plenty of things vying for my attention. Having one less of them does, in fact, make a difference.
  3. Detaching from social media in general–I’m still on Facebook, but not very often. I’m still on Scholé Sistership, but it has a limited Christian homeschool mom focus, few pictures, and is a uniquely edifying community.
  4. Growing in self-control–I mentioned last time using the Freedom app to help limit time on social platforms. I don’t use the app any more. Practicing self-control (by the grace of God) and growing in renewed affections for doing what needs to be done have me in a place where I don’t need the training wheels anymore.
  5. Growing in strength of will–Making decisions is easier when I’ve eliminated an entire category of potential decisions to make. I strengthen my will every time I exercise it in choosing to do the next right thing rather than scrolling a platform where “the next thing” is up to an algorithm. We train ourselves into habits, but our habits can also train us.

Even with some nostalgia, even though I still appreciate seeing new baby pics and other updates from friends on Facebook, I’m just less and less interested in social media in general. I’ve considered ditching it altogether. Maybe someday I will. I sure won’t be signing up for the Metaverse when it drops. No, thank you.

Please don’t mistake this for an anti-technology post. Here’s the deal. Technology is a blessing but it comes with risks, too. We each have to run our own cost-benefit analysis. Your particular situation may cause you to answer the social media question differently than I do. And that’s fine. Coming up with one rule for everyone isn’t the point.

The point is to wisely evaluate how we spend our time and attention, especially when it comes to apps that are designed to suck as much of both of them out of us as possible.

If you’ve been itching to get off of a social media platform and wonder if it’ll be alright, wonder if you can manage, wonder if it’s possible to live in the 21st century without it, let this post be a bit of encouragement to do what you need to do.

Yes, it will be ok.

There is life after Instagram. Real life. And it’s good. Don’t let peer pressure (or those “your friends will miss you” pre-programmed scripts) keep you from making a decision you know is right for you.

Two years later I’m still glad I ditched the ‘gram. No regrets, my friends. No regrets.

For more, see my original post [Real] Life After Instagram.

Resting on God

31 Tuesday May 2022

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I’m in the midst of a rather busy season. We still have three weeks left in our homeschool year, but summer, with its mowing, gardening, and adventuring, is already in full swing.

As the work picks up outside, mess and clutter build up inside, too. New projects create new piles, and sometimes it’s hard to walk through the house without tripping over something.

I might like to have my plans accomplished and tied up with a bow, but that doesn’t happen very often. I might like to have my whole house cleaned and organized at one time–even just the first floor all at one time!–but that feels like a distant dream and not a soon-to-be-had reality.

So when I sat at my desk to pray this morning after sleepily popping a couple pans of baked oatmeal into the oven, I gave thanks for all I could. And then I pulled out the Valley of Vision and read a prayer, one that happened to speak to me ever so sweetly even as it prompted me to speak to God. I would reproduce it here for you, but I want to respect copyrights, so I’ll link to it instead. The prayer is titled Resting on God. I hope you’ll find it an encouragement like I did.

As I roll up my sleeves and get busy with the day’s work, I’m going to try to keep these truths at the forefront of my mind. Join me?

The mind of man plans his way,
But the Lord directs his steps.

Proverbs 16:9

The counsel of the LORD stands forever, The plans of His heart from generation to generation.

Psalm 33:11

My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us. 

Psalm 62:5-8

Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Jesus in Matthew 11:28-29

Encouraging Resources for Christian Moms

01 Sunday May 2022

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This spring has been full of life: with garden work, schooling, spring cleaning, taxes, and adventures. I just wanted to hop on here today to share some of the wonderful things that I’ve been enjoying (mostly in my earbuds) lately. I’m on a bit of biblical womanhood kick, and whatever the world may bemoan about that subject, I’m incredibly refreshed by reminders of what God has both called me to and given me grace for in this life as a woman made in His image.

The Simplified Organization Podcast by Mystie Winckler (also available as YouTube videos). Mystie interviews Christian moms to get their best tips for parenting and home management to the glory of God. There’s a great variety of topics and tips. The practical and the spiritual don’t have to be kept in separate categories. 🙂 That’s what I love so much about this podcast (and other resources from Mystie)–not just life hacks, but real help toward godly faithfulness in both our homes and our hearts.

Fruitful Homemaker Podcast This is hosted by Emily Drew, a young mom (and fellow Arkansan!) who interviews older women in the faith. I love that she’s seeking to bring the Titus 2 wisdom of truly older women forward for today’s younger women to hear! Some notable guests include Martha Peace, Nancy Wilson, and Abigail Dodds.

Women Encouraged Podcast, Good Theology: As Mothers – with Nana Dolce This particular episode came recommended by a sweet new mom at my church. It’s a great encouragement to think carefully about what we believe and how that affects the relationships in our home–especially our lives lived out before our kids.

Dwell Podcast: Pouring from a Full Pitcher and The Difference between Peace and Self-Care These two episodes were a breath of fresh air from moms who (two out of three of them) have raised all their children and can now share a great deal of perspective on the long, hard seasons of motherhood and homeschooling.

Let Me Be a Woman by Elisabeth Elliot. This is an old classic–one I read in my early twenties and then lent to a friend…never to be seen again. I finally repurchased the book last year, and reading it the last month or so has been such a breath of fresh air in the midst the smoggy mess made by our culture’s current state of confusion.

Speaking of the current state of things, since finishing Let Me Be a Woman, I’ve begun listening to That Hideous Strength by C. S. Lewis. This third book of Lewis’ Space Trilogy confronts totalitarian scientism and many of the themes addressed in The Abolition of Man. It may seem like a strange addition to a list of “encouragement for moms,” but I’ve found it to be great food for thought. Elisabeth Elliot tells about being a woman. Lewis shows it. His character Jane wrestles through it, and Lewis, as the author, lets her be a woman. I’m not done with the book, but I’m finding it quite instructive and freeing, as I tend to have some of the same modern-woman hang-ups as Jane.

What encouragement have you found lately, mama? Not just to get through the long days of noise and messes, but what has been encouraging you to thrive in you role as a wife and mother? What resources help you lift up your eyes (Psalm 121)?

Why It’s Hard to Write about Sin

19 Saturday Mar 2022

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As I’ve considered how to write this series of posts on sin, guilt, and shame, I’ve come up against a bit of a problem, especially around the topic of sin. You see, I can’t write about sin as though it is something out there, separate from me.

It would be pretty easy (and would feel pretty good, wouldn’t it?) to point to the problems in others or in the world-at-large if I didn’t also suffer from the same malady. But the reality is that I do suffer from it. And as soon as I begin to wax eloquent on the topic through my writing, the Lord provides an opportunity to practice what I’m preaching.

You believe others ought to fight the sin that is within them. Have you noticed this particular area in your life that you’ve been ignoring? This particular instance of selfishness? Your latest indulgence? The pride that creeps in even as you write against sinful pride?

Sometimes such words are the gentle nudge of my loving heavenly Father, brimming with parental affection: Dear daughter, flee from these things. And look to My provision for you in Jesus.

Other times they are an attack of the accuser, laced with poison and deceit: You can’t write about sin. You’re filth yourself. A hypocrite. A self-righteous prig. A joke. Stop thinking you have any right to tell others what to do.

The Lord’s conviction compels me both to deal with my sin as the Spirit brings it to light and to not shrink back from speaking Truth, especially in the midst of a culture that glories in sin and shuns true righteousness. God’s desire is my repentance and joy in Christ, empowering me then to live in further obedience.

The accuser seeks to stop the work of God in me by keeping me weighed down with sin, continuing in despair rather than finding repentance, and using any opportunity to keep me from doing whatever it is that the Lord is calling me to do.

And so the task is laid before me: to be killing sin in me even as I write about it here to you.

The writing about it is, in fact, part of how the Lord is working on me. Perhaps that’s part of the reason that the going gets tough and the writing gets sparse. It’s uncomfortable. Submitting to the Lord’s discipline, the Spirit’s scrutinizing work on my heart, is hard. And I’m often tired. A little lazy. A bit too easily–or is it eagerly?–distracted.

Hebrews 4:13 reminds me: “…there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are open and laid bare to the eyes of Him with whom we have to do.” I may cringe at the invitation to to see what’s in my heart. But that doesn’t keep the Lord from seeing it. It’s all open before Him.

And as a Christian, as one who has trusted in Christ’s death and resurrection on my behalf, I have a great comfort and assurance in the verses that follow:

Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Hebrews 4:14-16

It would “be nice” if I could talk about sin from a position of real accomplishment, like I’m some kind of expert on the subject. Then I might feel qualified to write about it. But did you read the words from Hebrews? Jesus is the only One in that position, the only One truly qualified by virtue of the fact that He, being fully God and fully man, has been tempted in all things, yet without sin.

What you get here, my friends, is a fellow sinner attempting to relay the Truth handed down by the One whose words on the subject actually matter, actually carry weight, actually give life. As this series continues, keep that at the forefront of your minds.

Soon we’ll dive in to what sin is. But for now, as you may have guessed, I’m working up the courage both write about it and to submit myself to the Lord’s work on my heart through that process.

Thanks for joining me in this process. May the Lord be at work in us all for His glory. And may we not shrink from that work but instead draw near to the throne of grace with confidence, finding mercy and help in our need. As we move on to discuss sin more deeply, we’ll sure need it!

Don’t forget to share your thoughts in the comments below–I’d truly love to hear from you!

Other articles in this series:
Sorting through Our Sin, Guilt, and Shame
Girl, You’ve Got a Problem

Lately {February 2022}

28 Monday Feb 2022

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I’ve posted a few articles in the past few months, but I haven’t posted a personal update of any kind in a long while. Life has been full, so it seems like a good time!

Injuries

Back in August my husband broke his neck and my oldest son broke his arm (both by falling off of a backyard zipline). That began a new (unusually slow in some ways, unusually busy in others) season for us that lasted right up until Christmas, when Nathaniel was finally released from his neck brace. Woo-hoo!

Family picture with the neck brace.
And now without! Yes, same day for these pictures. This was the first time he played with taking the brace off for a picture.

We thought we were jumping into “normal” again when January rolled around. No injuries! No extra doctor’s appointments! The medical bills are almost behind us!

Loss

We had a steady first two weeks, and then my Grandma was put on hospice. We traveled to see her before she passed. We made it to town in time, but not to the hospital. Still, I was thankful to be there with my family, my parents and my brother. It was good to say “good bye” to Grandma together.

Last pic with my precious Grandma. At Christmas, when we visited PopPop’s grave at the National Cemetery.

Illness

The morning of the last day we planned to be there with family, Nathaniel woke up with a fever. A quick test confirmed he had that contagion that gets posts flagged on Facebook. We got out of dodge as quickly as we could, and thankfully my parents and brother stayed well. The boys and I, however, followed Nathaniel’s lead a few days later. Fevers and coughing and headaches, oh my.

We didn’t have as easy of a time as some, but we didn’t have a serious case, either–nor did we pass it to family. And for all of this, we are thankful for the Lord’s mercies.

Vacation

We had a ski trip planned two weeks from the day we first came down with the C bug. Fatigue and cough still present, we played with canceling, but to no avail.

We went ahead with our trip, and had a great time–but with doctor’s orders restraining Nathaniel from literally risking his neck on the slopes (avoiding trees and jumps in particular), and with some of that lingering fatigue holding us (mostly me) back at altitude, we took it easier than we normally would.

School

We had two solid weeks of school after Christmas break before we took school with us to visit family around Grandma’s passing. Sickness knocked us out for a week. And we got back to it for a week before taking a week of vacation. We’re back at it now. It feels like a very interrupted start to the spring semester, but our daily routine is strong, even if the Monday after a vacation is still the Monday after a vacation. 😉

And the Monday after that is a Monday, as well.

The boys are working independently on their core school work (math, writing, reading living books for various subjects), and the things that I’m teaching/doing with them are things that I’m excited to be learning alongside them (Latin, logic, and history read alouds).

Marxism

This may seem like a strange addition to the list, but the Scholé Sisters are doing a Spring Seminar called Excellent Marxmanship inside Sistership (the online network for Christian classical homeschool moms to discuss all-the-things–free to join, but this course is available at the paid Sophie level). Marxism, which is antithetical to Christianity, has influenced our modern world in many ways, and there’s no better way to see it for what it is than to get it from the source. I listened to The Communist Manifesto (available at librivox.org) back in 2020. That was a great first pass, and this Excellent Marxmanship seminar is giving me a chance to read it again and dig deeper–along with other ladies who are interested in Truth more than knee-jerk reactions. Along with Marx’s Manifesto, they’re reading two other books related to the subject. The background knowledge provided and discussion via comment threads and video chats makes this a high value course! It’s worth the cost of paid membership in Sistership, to be sure. Just make sure you can set aside some time for it.

Even if you can’t join this seminar, it’s valuable to read The Communist Manifesto for yourself. It’s sometimes hard to understand, sometimes (ok, often) infuriating, but well worth being aware of, especially if you are guiding your children through the ideological jungle of our world today.

A good book to pair with Marx would be C. S. Lewis’ The Abolition of Man. I’ve been thinking for a while that these two books, both short and a bit challenging, one diabolical and the other full of truth and insight, are so worth wrestling through in order to understand our world today. Let me know in the comments if you’ve read either of them or plan to!

Food

Prepping food for my family has always been part of my day job, but there have been some seasons, like last fall, where I get into survival mode and I rely way too often on canned refried beans and tortillas to get a quick meal of bean burritos on the table. We still love our bean burritos, but I’m getting creative in the kitchen again. 🙂 It’s funny how when you put just a little extra thought into something, even something as every day as dinner, you can turn the mundane into something creative. And it makes the whole process more enjoyable.

Spring

Every year I appreciate the coming of spring. We encounter trials and dry seasons in life, but God graciously gives us signs of life even during the coldest time of year. The trees started budding as soon as the days started getting longer again (back in January!). We’ve seen a few daffodil blooms in the past two weeks. Sure, I live in the south, so your experience may vary, but the imagery of spring, whenever it does come, is a beautiful reminder of a God who can raise the dead. Of a Father who provides for His children. Of a Savior who died to give us life and who rose again for our justification and our hope. I love finding hints of the gospel of grace in the world that God has made. As we look forward to spring, may you find those traces of His grace around you, as well.

Girl, You’ve Got a Problem (and so do I)

08 Saturday Jan 2022

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This article continues the discussion on how we deal with sin, guilt, and shame. Find the first part of this series here.

In our world today (and perhaps in humanity in general) we tend to confuse results with character. We tend to admire the folks who are “making it” and shake our heads at those who don’t. This mode of judgment turns inward on ourselves, too.

Am I failing at what I set out to do? Am I feeling not-awesome? “I’m bad.”

Am I achieving success? Are things going great? “I’m amazing.”

We carry guilt and shame (or else self-justification and pride) over these self-assessments, often ignoring an objective moral standard in favor of our own or society’s ideas about “success” and what we should be, do, or achieve.

Success failure God's standard freedom sin problem

This became shockingly evident to me when I read the results of a Barna poll from 2012. When Christian women were asked to choose what they struggle with the most, they rather staggeringly cited the modern “sins” of disorganization (50%) and inefficiency (42%), with traditional biblical sins like anger, selfishness, envy, and lust ranking much, much lower.

For the majority of respondents, it would seem their self-evaluations are guided more by extra-biblical categories than by scripture.

This focus on failures that undermine our personal success rather than sins as defined by God means our emotional heap of guilt and shame is often clouded, confused, false, or misplaced. And it means our confidence is on rocky ground, as well.

It’s no wonder women-focused memes often try to pick us up out of our pit of despair by telling us we’re beautiful and amazing and enough. That we can do it. Just follow this five step plan.

But these memes operate in the same muddied realm as our misguided guilt and shame.

To really be free from the disorienting weight we carry, we need clarity not congratulations, true relief not trite reassurance.

Heaping praise on ourselves usually just creates further shame and dissonance when we inevitably fail again.

Clarity comes when we look to a higher court of opinion than the flighty world around us or our fickle heart within us.

We feel weighed down with guilt, shame, and anxiety. Then someone tries to talk to us about our sin, our moral failings. What?! “I’m beating myself up enough already, thankyouverymuch.” In the moment, it feels better to talk about our struggles in non-moral/non-sinful terms. We assume that to go in that direction is an attack on our person, a hindrance to our well-being and self-esteem.

But what we don’t realize is that the world and our own hearts are harsh and inconsistent taskmasters. And our heavenly Father, who calls us to a higher standard, also grants us mercy and compassion. And in Jesus, we see that our God, who “will not break a bruised reed,” calls the weary to come to Him for rest and to find that His “yoke is easy and [His] burden is light.” (See Isaiah 42:3, Matthew 12:20, and Matthew 11:28-30.)

You see, our God is specific enough about actual sin, actual spiritual and moral failing, that we can know right from wrong–what pleases Him and what doesn’t. His commands have much more to do with love and faithfulness than with getting results or being productive. God’s call to righteousness is very different from the world’s call to awesomeness. The world focuses on outcomes, but God is most concerned with the substance of our daily living.

By submitting to what God’s word says is right, we can see real sin and guilt more accurately and deal with it promptly, freeing our conscience from a lot of weight and confusion–and freeing us to pursue faithfulness while trusting the outcomes to God.

If we allow our general feelings of success and failure to rule, either fearing others’ or our own scrutinizing judgment rather than fearing God, we will find an ever-present cycle of self-exaltation and self-condemnation. A crazy cycle that doesn’t bring the peace that God intends when He calls us to humble ourselves, confessing and turning from sin, and resting with confidence in the righteous Savior Jesus.

Other posts in this series:

Sorting through Our Sin, Guilt, and Shame